So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
My liver just had a heart attack.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
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