Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
