Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
