Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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