she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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