He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
