Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
