why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
