dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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