Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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