If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
My life is pants optional.
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