You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Randomize
