hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Randomize
