you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
