Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
There was a lot of him and a little penis
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
