I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
