Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
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