glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
