we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
