I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
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