We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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