Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I think I won the penis lottery.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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