did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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