Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
foreskin is a definite game changer
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
