hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize