NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
