wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
