I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
