What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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