so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
We don't watch enough power rangers
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Randomize
