how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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