from now on my penis is your penis
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
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