how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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