Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
40s are totally the cure
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
