Can Purell be used as lube?
Say something about gay babies.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
