Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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