I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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