David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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