Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
