When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize