I met the friendliest cop last night
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
