Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
