The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
