we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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