Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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