sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize
