Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
