after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Hippo gnu deer
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
