its not stalking. its research.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
