He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
